A few days ago, I received a text from one of my mentors.
The text says on the photo says:
“You are only one defining decision away from a totally different life. One defining decision can change your trajectory and put you on a new path toward the Promised Land. One defining decision can totally change the forecast of your life. And it’s those defining decisions that become the defining moments of our lives.”
These wise words are from Mark Batterson’s book, “The Circle Maker.”
After my last blog post (IDONTMIND), it’s no secret that I’ve experienced and still experience struggle. In the past, I kept my struggles to myself. A part of me genuinely believed that I could handle everything on my own, but boy, was I wrong. Looking back on it all, I’m so glad that I eventually broke down that wall and decided to speak up about what I’ve been through and what I still go through. It was because of that one defining decision that I began to see the light in my darkness, that I started to believe that things might actually get better.
Life is made up of defining decisions. Whether it’s deciding what jobs to apply for, or deciding how to respond to a text from your crush, or deciding what to invest your time and money in, or deciding to end a relationship, or maybe you’re like me and you have to decide whether or not you want to start being real with yourself and seek help. It’s those defining decisions that make you, you.
Recently, I discovered that something I constantly struggle with is getting over myself. Now, this may seem a little strange, so let me explain. There are a lot of things I’m working on — emotionally, mentally, spiritually, and physically. I’ve made goals. I have an idea of what my action plan should be. I know what small changes will lead to bigger changes. I know what I want and what I need to do. BUT, each time I want to take a step forward, I let fear and anxiety hold me back. I let myself get in the way of a different life. I’m one defining decision away from change.
Today, I decide to choose the latter.
Today, I decide that I can do this.
Today, I decide to start making changes.
Today, I decide that my fears and anxiety are not reasons to stay stagnant.
Today, I decide to get over myself and start moving forward.
The next part of my journey will be hard, but it’s not impossible.
There’s no way I would have reached this point if I hadn’t made the defining decision to ask for help. Without those in my life who saw me through all my struggles and haven’t given up on me, I’d still be trying to do this on my own. We’re not meant to do life alone, we’re meant to do life with others.
Find people who believe in you, want the best for you, and will help you through all of your defining decisions. But more than that, start believing in yourself. Keep fighting.
Always keep fighting.