My birthday week is slowly coming to an end, so I decided to end this week with a topic that is very important to me.
I am a strong supporter of the organization To Write Love On Her Arms (TWLOHA), which has given me hope and has encouraged me to keep moving forward. September is National Suicide Prevention Month, and this past month, TWLOHA held a campaign “And so I kept living,” which is based on a statement written by Matt Haig in his book, Reasons to Stay Alive. The hashtag #IKeptLiving is where many people shared their reasons to keep living, even in their darkest times.
This campaign really hit home for me. I’ve struggled with depression and anxiety since I was 18. There were times where I didn’t want to live another day, times where I would hope that I would go to sleep and never wake up. I never liked talking about how I felt because I didn’t want anyone to see how truly broken, weak, and vulnerable I am. Then one day, I came across TWLOHA and everything changed. I still suffer from depression and anxiety, but TWLOHA gave me hope and made me realize that I have so many reasons to keep living.
I participated in this campaign on World Suicide Prevention Day (WSPD) by posting a photo of a list of reasons why I kept living to my Instagram. I wanted to share some of those reasons with all of you. Some are silly, some are weird, and some are serious… But they’re all reasons that have kept me going.
Here are 25 reasons I kept living:
1. My past is a reminder of how far I’ve come
2. Pain is temporary
3. I refuse to let my depression control my life
4. I want to see my nieces grow up
5. One of the girls I mentor told me that I inspire her
6. I’m still searching for my purpose in life
7. I still have goals to accomplish
8. I need to prove myself wrong
9. I want to encourage and inspire others
10. What I feel now doesn’t compare to what’s ahead (Romans 8:18)
11. I want to be the person I needed when I was younger
12. I want to meet 5 Seconds of Summer and see them in concert again
13. I haven’t filled my Pokedex in Pokemon Go
14. My family and friends don’t deserve to think they aren’t enough
15. There will be sunsets that need to be photographed
16. I want to see my best friends get married
17. I haven’t seen Tori Kelly in concert
18. There will be more Grace Helbig, Megan Batoon, and Nikki Limo videos to watch
19. I want to have my own photography studio one day
20. There are still memories to be made
21. My best friend told me that he believes in me
22. I want to see if life really does get better
23. I found the beauty in my brokenness
24. I am enough
25. My story isn’t over
I kept living and I plan to keep on living.
I can’t promise things will get better, but what I can promise is that you’ll never know unless you keep living.
Learn more about TWLOHA here.